Wrangling Cheeky Monkeys and Other Noble Pursuits: Balls

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Balls

Which monkey has no balls?

We are a house that has balls. LOTS AND LOTS of balls. Literal and metaphorical AND anatomical. Balls GALORE. When I picked up Big's bedroom once, I found ELEVEN balls. You heard me. ELEVEN.

The other day I mentioned to Middle that our Little, who is nearly one, had no balls to call his own. I suggested that maybe Middle could buy some for Little for his birthday. Middle, a sporting fellow, was very pleased by this idea and promptly agreed to the plan. He sprinted over to Head Monkey and whispered in his ear. I thought he was sharing the plan.

NOPE.

Head Monkey's eyes grew wide, then he broke into a big smile.

What did Middle say?

Dad! Little has no balls!

The. End.

4 comments:

Moonbeam CatcherNovember 10, 2010 at 7:42 AM
Boys are the BEST!!!
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Wise WomanNovember 10, 2010 at 8:09 AM
Was Middle cheeky as he said it?
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Inner-Creative-VoiceNovember 10, 2010 at 1:57 PM
classic...*sigh*...between that and disturbing noises at the dinner table.
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JenniferNovember 10, 2010 at 2:04 PM
@ Wise Woman---not at all cheeky---deadly serious! This is clearly a BIG BIG problem! Tee hee.
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The Wrangler's Reading List

Your One Year Old (two year old, three year old, etc.) series. (There is a book for each age. Has helped me understand my children better as they grow).
When a Crocodile Eats the Sun: A Memoir of Africa by Peter Godwin (The best memoir I have read in a VERY long time. And I read a lot of memoir).
To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee. (I've read this at five distinct points in my life and have learned something new EVERY SINGLE TIME.)
The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver
The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan
The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin (This little gem was a timely recommendation from a very good friend. I have put a lot of its tenets into practice, and will confess that it has improved my overall happiness).
The Discipline Book by Dr. William Sears
Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austin
Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child. Thanks, Julia, for teaching me how to bake french bread. My family thanks you as well.
Make It Fast, Cook It Slow by Stephanie O'Dea
Anne Lamott. ANYTHING she writes. I love how she is reverently irreverant.
Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver
1,2,3 Magic by the man, whose name I have forgotten, who wrote about how to put this very intuitive and yet magical parenting technique into practice. Wish I had thought of that. I also wish I had invented those Silly Bandz that turn children into rabid Silly Bandz-collecting dogs. Ah, well.